friends?

are you a TRUE friend?
i am tired of finding new friends
finding new people to talk to
lying to others and lying to myself
lying just to get acceptance.....
pleasing others and always giving in
never said no and always trying to help
i guess...its all over right now
i am not gonna do it anymore
why should i need to have friends who don't even bother?
who betray you
just need you when they are in trouble
just need you to be there for them but they are never there for you
always asking for help but they will never help you
maybe some times being alone is better
eventhough being alone really hurts
its like you are the only one in this world
no one there for you
no one to care for you
no one to say ur feelings too
no one to see you through
whats the point of living then?
sometimes i think that
i am okay and i am always okay with it
no friends its okay what since there are lots of people who no friends
but then when look back
feel very lonely
i don't want to be their maid or dogs anymore
i don't want to get used all the time
i don't want to follow the things they do
and always get punish for no reason
how come i am so foolish
just realised it now
just realised that all this while
i am all alone
no one to talk to
no one to listen what i say
no one ever like me for me
sometimes i thought
maybe i can change me
maybe i can be someone else
well maybe for now
living alone for a while is okay
i hope i will find true friends soon
people who like you for who you are
not for who you pretend to be
not for what you give
and not for what you do
just like you for YOU
is there friends like that?
maybe there is
just that i haven't met one
or the one that i met have been gone

-yuko-